I don’t miss professional sports, do you?

As for baseball, let’s be honest. It’s boring to watch and it’s even boring to play. Ordinary people who aren’t being paid to play baseball cannot endure it except by playing it co-ed with beer, which makes practically anything endurable including watching paint dry.

About 90% of baseball consists of the players standing around while touching their privates whenever the TV camera is pointed at them or sitting around the dugout pretending to watch the other team while touching their privates. They often spit.

Why do people pay to see millionaires lolling about in a park and hiding in a little concrete bomb shelter while spitting and touching their privates? I can get that from the vagrants who live in the park and under the viaduct. For free.

If you’re a baseball fan, your life is very small. There’s a reason this game hasn’t caught on in the rest of the world (except in Japan, a country that practically defines boredom).

By the way, this has nothing to do with the fact that I was cut from the 9th Grade baseball team in an unfair, cruel and incompetent decision from which I’ve fully recovered and about which I have no hard feelings.

How about football? I’ll admit that football is fun to watch. It’s something like the Roman circus but without the lions. You get to watch overweight men collide helmet-to-helmet at breakneck speed and sometimes break their necks. What’s not to like?

Well, there’s the business where they taunt spectators who’ve paid a full day’s pay for a ticket by kneeling when the National Anthem is played. And they complain that they get paid only a million dollars a year unless they perform well, in which case they get only ten times that. And they pretend not to hear a player’s ugly antisemitic, Hitlerian remarks.

And they plan to play something called the “Black National Anthem.” If there’s a “Black National Anthem” then doesn’t that mean there’s a black nation? And conversely a white nation?

Are they actually promoting racially segregated nations?  Has anyone thought this through?

And they shout down anyone who disagrees with their politics, including their own teammates, since they’re all political and Constitutional Law experts except the ones that disagree with them who are all racists.

Then there’s basketball, a winter sport. They plan to resume their curtailed season sometime this summer with slogans of Black Lives Matter – an organization described by its cofounder as “trained Marxists.”

Such slogans include “Black Lives Matter,” “I Can’t Breathe” and “Group Economics.” The economics of this particular group includes average pay of $7 million a year but “$7 Million” is not one of the approved slogans for these $7 million dollar men.

Another unapproved slogan is “Black Wives Matter” because they apparently still don’t, at least not to NBA players.

And don’t you dare say that the lives of other races matter, because that’s racist now and if you say it, you’ll be cancelled or killed.

(Feel free to add to this rant in a comment. There’s more ground to cover on this topic than in center field of Minute Maid Park.)

People spend around 20,000 hours watching sports over the course of their lifetimes. That’s often more time than they spend with their children, and way more time than they spend on charitable activities, home improvement or actually participating in sports as opposed to watching others play.

Let’s be better than that. Let’s just say no to professional sports. Let’s get lives of our own.

(Subscribe with an email to theAspenbeat@gmail.com)

67 thoughts on “I don’t miss professional sports, do you?

  1. I’ve been an NHL fan since I was a kid in the early sixties. As of today, August 1, 2020, I have resolved never to watch another game, having just discovered that the league has gone full SJW mode. I respect all people and deplore injustice of any kind. Having said that, I don’t need the NHL bigwigs preaching social justice to me and telling me I need to read “White Fragility”. The attitude of moral superiority—–and their perceived need to educate the great unwashed—–projected by the pro sports leagues these days has become insufferable. If they all disappeared tomorrow I wouldn’t shed a tear. Truly sad it’s come to this.

    • Kenneth, I wish I had your strength and could boycott hockey for their dumb assery, but alas, I am too emotionally involved to just walk away. (sob)
      My heart skips a beat when I hear a puck drop…and the ping when it hits the metal frame…and the whoosh as it skims the net. …dont judge me…I just cant.

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