ONE MILLION DOLLARS for the leaker of Joe’s cognitive test

Joe Biden is cognitively impaired. He gets confused as to where he is, who he is, and what he is. He forgets the names and circumstances around him. He refuses to keep to his teleprompter script, and refuses to recognize how much he should.

Truculently and combatively, he blames reporters and calls them “stupid” – even friendly ones – for merely asking good questions to which he has no intelligible answers.

If I didn’t despise Biden’s policies, personality, greed, girl-fondling, criminal son, ethics, dishonesty, hair plugs, and ladder-climbing “doctor” wife, I’d feel sorry for him.

But I do, and so I don’t.

The president of the United States gets good medical care. Joe’s weird outbursts point obviously to a medical condition. Any doctor – OK, maybe not an Ed.D. but certainly any real one – would say his condition suggests a decline in cognitive ability consistent with senility, dementia or Alzheimer’s disease.

It’s true that Joe never had much gray matter to begin with. But he seems to have even less now. It’s become bad enough that people beyond the usual politicians seeking political advantage are concerned. From our NATO allies to loyal Democrats there’s worry – and from Moscow to Beijing there’s glee – that what used to be called The Leader of the Free World is pooping his pants in front of the Pope.

Any competent physician, and all of Joe’s physicians, if not his “doctor,” fall into that category, would want more information.

The first step in diagnosing a person with these symptoms and age is to administer a simple cognitive test. These are easy and non-invasive. If you’re over 65, it’s likely that your physician has administered one to you even if you display no symptoms of cognitive decline and even if you were unaware that she was administering the test.

In the informal form, the physician simply notes the ability of the patient to follow and remember what he’s being told. As the physician’s ordinary exam wraps up, he tactfully explores whether the patient still remembers the details of a half-hour ago.

In the formal form, the test involves advising the patient of the test, and then asking him specific questions. For example, a common question is to ask the patient to count backward from 100 by 7’s. If you get all the way back to negative numbers, that’s a good sign.

Joe has undoubtedly been administered such tests. For his physicians not to, would be medical malpractice and a danger to their patient, to the United States of America and to the rest of the world.

So where are the results? When the media questioned Donald Trump’s mental fitness for office, he took the test and the White House immediately published the results (he aced it).

In Joe’s case, the only conceivable explanation is that the White House is keeping the test results secret. You can guess why.

So, here’s my offer. A small number of people have access to Joe’s test. For the good of humanity, The Aspen Beat implores those people to leak (legally and ethically of course) authentic results for publication herein. The Aspen Beat – in the style of Dr. Evil – will do its best through readers, supporters and online fundraising outfits to pay the leaker ONE MILLION DOLLARS. (Hunter, are you listening?)

Ah, but you say the Democrats have bigger guns and deeper war chests. Someone like George Soros will raise the bidding with an offer to pay ten million to the would-be leaker not to leak.

To those Democrats I say, don’t make me call Elon Musk. You’ll be sorry.

14 thoughts on “ONE MILLION DOLLARS for the leaker of Joe’s cognitive test

  1. If Joe can’t count backwards all the way to negative numbers, polling data may do it for him.
    Anyway, count me in as a “supporter” of your quest!

  2. I would donate one month’s worth of my social security check ($472) to help the cause.

    Seriously, this is one of the reasons for reforming the Electoral College. This could be done by selecting the Electors during the mid-term elections so that the College is in place before anyone officially announces for office. The College then schedules interviews with all the candidates. These interviews could take place in each state capitol in televised sessions, one on one, no teleprompters, no aides, no journalists, no notes, no lawyers, just the candidate and the Electors of that state. The College should have full subpoena powers for everything, including school transcripts, legal proceedings, taxes, medical issues, etc.

    Since the Constitution does not require all this, the results would not keep a person off the ballot, but a full accounting would go a long way towards informing the public.

    • Since the elector select the President, if we chose electors at mid-term, what would we be voting fur in Presidential election years?

      • While it wouldn’t bother me in the slightest to forget the popular vote for president all together, I suppose we could just tell the people that we would now be doing what they think we are already doing, voting for the president. The popular vote, however, would be just ONE factor to be considered by the Electors when choosing the next president.

  3. Are we any better than the democrats who spent 4 years criticizing President Trump and millions of dollars trying to unseat him? Bide our time to 2024 and pray for Biden in the meantime might be more productive?

    • Yes, we’re better! So much better that we’ve been politely sitting back for years while they accomplished the take over of our country! These people should be arrested for treason, they have known all along he’s got dementia. But that was the plan, they had someone else to run the country in the background. Isn’t that treason?
      BTW, there’s a YouTube video of Obama, at the end of his term, saying he wished he could have a front man, wearing an earpiece, so he could continue being in power. Not exactly his words, but… Anyway, Biden is wearing an earpiece and they’ve been propping him up to stand out in front.

  4. So where are the results? … you ask.

    I say they are locked up tighter than the nuclear launch codes at NORAD.

    If not … then they are stored right next to the recovered Ark Of The Covenant, forever misplaced within a myriad of US government warehouses.

    Wishing all a Blessed Good Friday, Passover, and Resurrection Sunday.

  5. In my humble opinion, Biden failed the reality test that was surreptitiously and beautifully staged to coincide with the White House Easter Egg hunt. The Iranian secret agent infiltrator of the President’s Secret Service detail who played the Easter Bunny clearly revealed that Slow Joe has lost his grip. The female Russian agent who was standing in for Dr. Jill (and didn’t she pull off that impersonation perfectly?) delivered the coup de grace! Joe stood revealed before the world as the brain-dead, addlepated, mentally and physically deteriorated shell of a human being that he is. Vlad Putin smiled.

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