Two Score and 10 Shades of Grey

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The kinky movie “50 Shades of Grey” came out this Valentine’s Day weekend (St. Valentine must be turning in his Catholic grave), so naturally, a movie review is necessary.

Others at the newspaper are assigned to report on skiing conditions here in Aspen or they get to review “American Sniper.” Me? I have to review a kinky movie. I admire the way the bosses identify and utilize each person’s unique talents to the fullest, but, um, how did they know?

Anyway, the movie is about a woman named Anastasia (exotic, huh?) and a man named Christian (ah, there’s the connection to St. Valentine) who engage in the sort of vile, grotesque and evil eroticism that others have the prudence only to hope for, fantasize about and dream of.

In some scenes, Continue reading

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Lame Duck on the Loose!

Obama“The bear’s on the loose!” That’s what President Barack Obama reportedly likes to say when a herd of Secret Service agents escort him out of the White House.

He pretends that he’s sneaking out but makes a point of telling everyone. They, in turn, are instructed to relay this “news” to the fawning White House press reporters.

It’s supposed to be great theater. Think of Yogi the Bear, but skinny with big ears and mom jeans.

But Bear-ack Obama and his keepers don’t lumber off to Jellystone Park. Instead, they typically helicopter to the first tee, where he’s been sighted 208 times since becoming president. The closest this bear gets to the woods is the rough, where he and his pack of Secret Service agents are often seen foraging for his lost balls. (His proficiency at golf is apparently uncorrelated to his practice at it.)

Meanwhile, back at the Capitol Continue reading