the Aspen beat

Glenn K. Beaton is a writer and columnist living in Colorado. He has been a contributor to The Wall Street Journal, RealClearPolitics, Powerline, Instapundit, American Thinker, Fox News and numerous other print, radio and television outlets.

Modern education is crap — or Lincoln, math and the CDC are racist

Posted on March 30, 2021 by onthebeatontrack

The Center for Disease Control announced in February that schools could safely reopen, and that it was “critical” that they do so. They said the risk of COVID transmission in schools was minimal — even if teachers were not vaccinated — and the damage to children by remaining closed was maximal.

Experience in the schools that have opened bears that out. There have not been cases of widespread transmission of COVID in reopened schools. That’s undoubtedly because children are nearly immune to COVID. And their teachers retire long before they reach the COVID-vulnerable post-65 age group.

That CDC announcement that teachers, vaccinated or not, should return to work was two months ago, though it didn’t get much media attention because teachers are overwhelmingly Democrats and so are the media. Since then, many teachers still refuse to return to work even though many have been vaccinated in the meantime.

So much for “follow the science.”

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Modern art is crap – is Jackson Pollock better than The Aspen Beat?

Posted on March 25, 2021 by onthebeatontrack

Which of these large paintings is better? One is by renowned artist Jackson Pollock, and one is by yours truly, The Aspen Beat.

I’m not known as an artist – heck, I’m not even known as a writer – but I can still apply paint to canvas, to myself and to everything else in the vicinity. That’s where my similarities with Pollock end.

Pollock was born in Cody, Wyoming, got expelled from two high schools, liked Mexican murals, was an alcoholic, and died drunk when he rolled his convertible. The car interior wound up looking like one of his paintings.

On an artistic level, Pollock is less admirable. His technique was to put the canvas on the floor and drip paint onto it. He called it his “drip technique.”

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Modern music is crap – is WAP as good as Dylan?

Posted on March 22, 2021 by onthebeatontrack

Wet A** P*ssy is “the defining song of 2020” according to so-called critics/journalists who make a living fawning over this crap. WAP debuted at No. 1 on the Billboard 100. For weeks it squatted atop the charts like a sweaty naked fat woman on a toilet.

In “the raunchiest set the Grammy’s have ever seen” that annual television info-award-mercial featured a live performance of WAP. Incompetently acclaimed and shamelessly promoted by those same so-called critics/journalists, the spectacle held all the artistry of a Mexican border town donkey show.

It’s no coincidence that television ratings for the Grammy’s were down 53% this year. I agree with the fawning fools on one thing, however: This is indeed the defining song of 2020.

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Meghan Markle, The Tempest of the Shrew (no, Andrea, this is not Faulkner)

Posted on March 15, 2021 by onthebeatontrack

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Two royal lovebirds, seeking booty and plunder,

In Faerie Oprahland now make the scene —

Where ancient decorum is torn asunder,

Where woke outrage makes civil thought unclean.

From forth both pedigreed and bi-racial loins,

This pair of caste-crossed wokesters have their say

And, in the surge of ratings and coins,

Prove every dog will have its day.

Their three-hour display of PC whinging

And poor victimized Meghan’s smouldering rage

— Though it may produce a lot of cringing —

Is now the sordid subject of this page;

The which, if you with sharpest eye shall read,

What here you miss, your soul within shall heed.

They call him Harry. Could there be a more fitting name for this misguided, purposeless, carrot-topped, not-in-line-to-the-throne fool?

Continue reading →

Two royal lovebirds, seeking booty and plunder,

In Faerie Oprahland now make the scene —

Where ancient decorum is torn asunder,

Where woke outrage makes civil thought unclean.

From forth both pedigreed and bi-racial loins,

This pair of caste-crossed wokesters have their say

And, in the surge of ratings and coins,

Prove every dog will have its day.

Their three-hour display of PC whinging

And poor victimized Meghan’s smouldering rage

— Though it may produce a lot of cringing —

Is now the sordid subject of this page;

The which, if you with sharpest eye shall read,

What here you miss, your soul within shall heed.

They call him Harry. Could there be a more fitting name for this misguided, purposeless, carrot-topped, not-in-line-to-the-throne fool?

Continue reading →

Will BLM cancel MLK?

Posted on March 11, 2021 by onthebeatontrack

“I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.”

— Martin Luther King Jr., 1963, at the Lincoln Memorial

Now, fifty-eight years later, Black Lives Matter and the politically correct wokerati scorn and condemn the land King dreamed of. We’re told that if we judge people by their character, we’re racist.

Character, we’re told, is a dog whistle for white supremacy. Hard work, rule-following, merit, law-abiding, test scores, marriage, family, honesty, generosity, loyalty, decency and objective measurements of productivity are simply white tools to subordinate minorities.

The left argues that people who value these traits do better in the game of life – and they do – and that those people tend not to be the left’s favored flavors of skin colors. Therefore, these traits are bad and must be de-legitimized.

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Is Mulberry Street racist? You decide

Posted on March 4, 2021 by onthebeatontrack

dr-seuss-column

People of my generation learned to read with Dr. Seuss. Sure, there were some child-like hijinks in the doctor’s prescriptions but to many toddlers the rhyme and rhythm were music to the ears, tonic to the souls and tutors to the unschooled. Mostly, they were exactly what Dr. Seuss intended them to be – entertaining, mischievous children’s literature.

Dr. Seuss succeeded for nearly a century. In that time, millions of children learned to read and Dr. Seuss was awarded numerous prizes. President Barack Obama lauded him in 2016: “March 2 is also the birthday of one of America’s revered wordsmiths. Theodor Seuss Geisel — or Dr. Seuss — used his incredible talent to instill in his most impressionable readers universal values we all hold dear.”

Dr. Seuss is the Left’s latest victim. They cancelled him. eBay has banned many of his books including “And to think that I saw it on Mulberry Street.” (while continuing to sell Mein Kampf). The company that survives him, Dr. Seuss Enterprises, grovels that, “These books portray people in ways that are hurtful and wrong.” The cardboard cutout passing for the current President of the United States or America has expunged Dr. Seuss from his proclamation celebrating Read Across America Day.

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What’s up with Biden’s transsexual?

Posted on March 2, 2021 by onthebeatontrack

If you want to be part of Joe Biden’s administration, you need to be a “first.”

I don’t mean “first” like first in your college graduation class. Heck, Biden himself was only in the top 50% of his law school class according to Biden and only in the top 85% according to the school records.

No, not that kind of first. After all, this is a Democrat administration and so we’re not talking about dead white patriarchal European so-called merit.

What we’re talking about is that you need to be a “first” in your skin color or sexuality. Such as “first Asian Director of the Office of Management and Budget” or “first black woman vice president” or “first gay cabinet member” or “first Native American cabinet secretary.”

Or the subject of this column. Biden boasts that he has nominated the first transsexual Assistant Secretary for Health and Human Services.

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Two royal lovebirds, seeking booty and plunder,

In Faerie Oprahland now make the scene —

Where ancient decorum is torn asunder,

Where woke outrage makes civil thought unclean.

From forth both pedigreed and bi-racial loins,

This pair of caste-crossed wokesters have their say

And, in the surge of ratings and coins,

Prove every dog will have its day.

Their three-hour display of PC whinging

And poor victimized Meghan’s smouldering rage

— Though it may produce a lot of cringing —

Is now the sordid subject of this page;

The which, if you with sharpest eye shall read,

What here you miss, your soul within shall heed.

Two royal lovebirds, seeking booty and plunder,

In Faerie Oprahland now make the scene —

Where ancient decorum is torn asunder,

Where woke outrage makes civil thought unclean.

From forth both pedigreed and bi-racial loins,

This pair of caste-crossed wokesters have their say

And, in the surge of ratings and coins,

Prove every dog will have its day.

Their three-hour display of PC whinging

And poor victimized Meghan’s smouldering rage

— Though it may produce a lot of cringing —

Is now the sordid subject of this page;

The which, if you with sharpest eye shall read,

What here you miss, your soul within shall heed.

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